joaquin used to teach people how to dissect cadavers. can you imagine? he had a mohawk and that manical glint in his eye, and he was saying things like, "now slice through the eyeball and pull out the lens. he-he-he-he-he. it bounces. watch it bounce. he he he."
stephen, i know you like for people to welcome you and give you love, but the sad truth about this blogger thing seems to be that everyone just sort of jumps in with strange anecdotes like dead lizards in otherwise empty trashcans, and then they jump back out again. guerilla blogging, it's called. so just latch onto a strange and/or creepy anecdote and leap before you look.
in other news, im now getting mail addressed to "Paul Cockeram, Iowa State University, Dept of English" and it makes me feel like the fucking bomb. im going to ask for free books from St. Martin's press, and then if i use them for my class next term i'll get love and free books from the company, and my students will hate me for making them buy expensive books. im drunk on power.
Holly: SUE THAT BITCH WHAT HIT YO ASS. THEN SUE YOUR WORKPLACE FOR THE ANKLE THING. THEN GO ON VACATION.
posted by Paully at 1:16 PM link/comments
