my fingernails are dirty - probably the upshot of spending all day collecting various detritus from scattered previous abodes and bringing it all together into my new one, but i prefer to think of my fingernails as an analogy for my life < depressed rant > i can't understand how complacent i'm being about losing my job. it was the best thing that had ever happened to me career wise. it was a real job. through a self fulfilling prophecy i screwed it up - all the time beleiving deep inside that i was somehow a fraud, and that i was only a matter of time before they found me out - turns out i was right.... *weak grin* i don't have the technical aptitude to understand what the developers were talking about - and my attempts to cover it up with sage nods and meaningless note taking only evidenced themselves further when i presented sage, meaningless documents purporting to concern the subject matter at hand. Perhaps it was some of the company's fault, taking on someone who professed his own ignorance in the interview, but somehow i think maybe i could have worked harder - made up for the fact that i just didn't understand what was going on... the bit where they decided i was going to run their marketing campaign came right out of left field.. i was never comfortable with that, and i told them so... making cold calls to vice presidents of multinational software companies is not on my list of "things i most like to do" - in fact it probably makes the bottom three hundred - right before < in joke > inserting an orange into my own anus < /in joke > < /depressed rant > my junior high school dance memory? being the boy who didn't get kissed until he was 14....... (god somebody please put this morbid Aussie out of his misery) seriously gang - don't sweat - just need to reevaluate some shit - i need to start seriously looking for a job tomorrow and i'm quite worried about it - i'm not sure that my skill set is applicable to anything
posted by billyjoe noodle-bob at 7:09 AM link/comments
