weathermen don't tend to sign their name on the backdrop round these parts. at least not in cleveland. maybe it's chic in other parts of the nation to practice one's john hancock on a jetstream map. dunno. went to pa this weekend. decided on friday to take my cat tiamet with me because she's on medication for her little urinary tract problem and i wanted to keep an eye on her. upon arriving at my parents' house, i foolishly took tia out of her travel carrier and walked into the house with her in my arms. soon realized that this was a bad idea as parents' dog harbors ungodly hatred for all animals other than parents' cat. tia was freaking out, so i decided to take her out to the garage to put her back into the carrier. didn't quite make it to the door. here is a synopsis of what happened next: *dog scares cat hand is still bandaged, which explains my unabashed lack of capital letters in this post. so far, hand is showing few signs of infection, which is good, because i really don't feel like taking time off work for a doctor visit and tetanus shot. i am, however, extremely irritated by the fact that i'm still unable to make a fist or entirely straighten my fingers. saw my grandmother on saturday. she's convinced that i should demand medical attention for the injury, up to and including amputation of the offending hand, lest i suddenly expire from blood poisoning and/or lockjaw. pets.
*cat freaks, claws kate's shoulder, tries to climb wallpaper
*cat fails to defy gravity and hits floor
*cat runs toward kitchen, dog gives chase
*dog catches cat near parents' picture window
*fur flies as dog and cat attempt to tear each other to shreds
*kate reaches into carnage in attempt to extract dog
*cat decides that appropriate course of escape would be to climb mutton of kitchen window (it's like a wooden panel/grate/tictactoe board thingy that rests in the window and looks pretty)
*cat has forgotten that previous attempt at defying gravity was fruitless
*mutton tumbles out of window, taking cat with it
*mutton splinters into bits on floor
*falling mutton also knocks over several of mom's knick-knacks which live on window sill
*stunned cat is once again ravaged by bloodthirsty dog
*kate grabs dog by scruff of neck and manages, with aid of mother, to hurl dog out back door
*cat settles under kitchen table, where she spends next 20 minutes making kitty growling/muttering noises
*kate realizes that right hand needs attention. back of hand and right ring finger each contain charmingly deep puncture wounds, both of which are bleeding profusely
*kate races to kitchen sink to attend to hand. becomes lightheaded and nauseous; considers passing out on kitchen floor; rejects idea on basis that losing consciousness in kitchen might cause mother undue stress.
posted by Kate at 9:44 AM link/comments
