Scene: Moments ago. Kate at her desk. Phone rings.

Kate: (usual at-work salutation)
Mom: DID YOU START SMOKING AGAIN??!!
Kate: Whu ..? I ... ? No!
Mom: Are you sure?
Kate: (beginning to feel inexplicably guilty, even though she knows damn well she hasn't done anything wrong)YES, I'm sure. What brought THIS on?
Mom: I had a dream last night that you came home and you were smoking again. So I threw you out of the house.
Kate: ...
Mom: When I woke up, I was so pissed off at you.
Kate: I'm not smoking again, Mother.
Mom: (in threatening uber-maternal voice)Well you'd better not be.

Great. Now I'm getting in trouble for transgressions concocted by my mother's subconscious.