The local obnoxious morning radio show people were hosting a "Lamest Father's Day Gift You Received" contest this morning. Area dads were calling in lamenting their misfortune for a chance at 5th-row Tom Petty concert seats. Everything was pretty standard ("a bad tie"; "motor oil"; "fingernail clippers") until this guy: Host: Hey, sir! What'd you get for Father's Day?
Guy: I got a separation.
Host: I'm sorry, what?
Guy: A separation.
Host (realizing the subject matter at hand could be a vast departure from 'zany morning show' format): You mean your wife and you are separating?
Guy (bitterly): Yep.
Host (nervously): Uh. And you had to tell the kids on Father's Day?
Guy: Well, they're still little, so they don't understand yet.
Host: Oh ... man ... Listen, dude. Are you sure you want to be doing this?
Guy: Yes, I'm sure. (voice gaining anger now) And you know what else?
Host (weakly): What?
Guy (venom dripping from every word): Found out the wife was seeing someone else yesterday, too.
Host: Uh ... wow. Uh. Thanks for the call.
Guy: You're welcome. (phone slams down)
posted by Kate at 10:57 AM link/comments
