Super Bowl Highlights:
Personal Consumption Statistics:
Number of croissant-wrapped cocktail weiners: 9;
Ounces of velveeta/sausage/greenchile/tomato dip: 5;
Ounces of sourcream/creamcheese/cheddar/tomato taco dip: 3;
Number of soft-diet-prohibited tortilla chips: like, half a bag;
Pieces of sauerkraut-soaked kilebasa: 3;
Number of fresh vegetables from veggie tray: Utterly ignored;
Pieces of chocolate cheesecake: 1;
Number of antacids since 8 a.m. today: 7.
Other:
Number of Americans who, in unison, said, "Dude, was that just Janet Jackson's boob?": approximately 130 million, including 5 in my living room.
Which reminds me:
So let me get this straight. Half of America is losing its shit because Janet's augmented breast appeared on air for about 2 seconds. Her nipple was COVERED by a shiny pasty-type-thing. So someone please explain to me how that was any different than Li'l Kim's outfit at the Grammys a few years ago. Or Gwyneth's icky gothic number.
It was a BREAST. No one was publicly disembowled, and it's not like Timberlake was waving his dick at the jumbotron camera. Will everyone please relax?
posted by Kate at 12:40 PM link/comments
