I'd like to show you what my life is like right now.
I decided that I wasn't going to do what I always do when I move, which is to pack up everything in no particular order -- just PACK it godammit -- just to get it the hell over with. This time, there's a jihad on junk and clutter. See those trash bags? Those there, on top the boxes? That's just trash from TODAY. That's not even counting the 9 bags we dragged out to the curb last night.
This says a lot about me. I blame the Catholic upbringing.
Here we see some old CPUs and monitors. Notice how the monitors appear to be leading a march. I want them to march out of my house and into the trash, but Marc won't allow it, because as you'll see, he clearly doesn't have enough computers.
Another computer ... our apartment mainframe. Notice the additional computer peeking out from the corner.
Well, looky what's hiding under a box of books (I had no idea my husband was such a huge Tom Clancy fan) in Marc's office closet ... another computer!
Gah! Lawdy, just turn your head. It's like a computer gore flick ... all those guts hanging out everywhere.
Oh, for pity's sake.
At least the cats are happy, because there are empty cardboard boxes to be jumped in and out of.
We should probably reinstall this thing before we move out.
Oooh! Making progress! Behold the near-emptiness of my office!
More emptiness! Empty closet! According to cats, empty closets are also good for jumping in and out of.
This is all the stuff that used to be in my office and in that now-cat-containing closet. We have to move it all into a U-Haul, then drive it across town, then move it all out of a U-Haul, then unpack it, and I'm getting a little dyspeptic just thinking about it.
Why why why did I take this pressure cooker when my grandmother offered it to me? It's a good pressure cooker; I shouldn't throw it away. But I'm afraid of the pressure cooker, even if it is capable of cooking an entire side of beef in under three minutes. I'm afraid I'll open it and it'll explode in a horrific bang of beef bits and hot air, and the entire side of my face will be relieved of its flesh, and I'll have to walk around for the rest of my life looking like Tommy Lee Jones in that Batman movie. I will never use the pressure cooker, yet I will cart it around with me for many years to come. I must start having children immediately, because the sooner I can get them to move out and get their own apartments, the sooner I can get rid of the pressure cooker.
posted by Kate at 10:51 PM link/comments
